It's here!!!

The lusted after machine has come.....first off, I worked up a sweat just trying to get the blasted and those aren't the words that I was using machine out of the box. I am now covered with the tiniest little styrofoam balls, that are attached to my sweating brow/head/neck. I threw the boxes out instantly because that is a bad omen right from the start. First off when I was reading the reviews, I was laughing at some dope that cut his finger on the blender blade....duh no kidding. So as I was getting all of the foam paper, duct tape, insulation tape, scotch tape, surgical tape and every other darn tape out of this machine, I reached into the cutting blades to remove paper that was in there and sliced my finger wide open....I'm not laughing at that guy anymore. I open the directions which are 160 pages long and written in every language but where is the English?? Ok so I find the English and do what it says, but, no I am an expert at drink mixing, I am going to use Watermelon that I have to eat to make a slushy....so I clean all of the food parts, quickly, how badly can you get sick from blood on the blade and oil?? I place a bunch of watermelon in the holder, ice in the hopper, after a little coercing I got the blender properly seated into the machine and turn it on....shaved ice is shooting out of the top, oh baby this is gonna be sweet!! Then like it is supposed to do the blender kicks on and nothing is moving???? Hey TV shows it moves????? No blending action going on here. So I stop it, what now??? I am still sweating profusely and in dire need of this smoothy. I shake it up a bit and while I am trying to once again persuade it to sit properly onto the machine , unbeknown to me I am unscrewing the bottom and now watermelon juice is flowing out of it. I am a pipefitter and we all know righty tighty, but this is a left handed thread, see where this is going?? I now am wringing wet and have sticky stinky watermelon juice cascading down my counter front onto the floor. I am grabbing paper towel to wipe me and the counter off. The machine has a death grip on the now leaking blender and I can't get it out.....Please no don't have a fit right now, you have waited two years to get this machine, don't break it now.....relax, wipe the stinging sweat out of your eyes and be gentle. all I needed was for the phone to ring. Ok we got it out and threw it all out, let's start over, let's look for a recipe that they give you...hhhmmmm one, tequilla, margerita mix and lime juice. there is adding involved it comes to 13 oz. total. I grab lime juice, gingerale and look for the mint?? no mint, oh well this will be just a wet iced drink!!!! Voila, now I wish I had tequilla!!! So I guess you need to buy the special 4,000 drinks book to make the rest of them....I need a shower and a drink!!!!!