Public Speaking 101

Ok, Ok, so the room is not brimming with knitters intent on getting my autograph and to hear funny wittisim about knitting and life. This talk could have went two ways...I had 27 slides...either I was going to eat chocolate and finish the speech in nano seconds, talking like I was on speed, or I was going to have them shifting cheeks, and smiling politely out of boredom and serving breakfast in the morning. It actually went, right along in a timely fashion. I didn't find myself zipping through the presentation and tried terribly hard to keep going "Uhhhmmmm or Sooooooo....". I actually took these photos before the meeting started..I was afraid nerves would get me and I would forget. Supposedly many women were to bring their sock machines....those many women ended up being Janyce, Susan, the program director and myself...I could see we were off to a good start. The presentation went off smoothly other than I got a dry throat and almost commenced to choke on my own spittle..it's always a wonderful way to break the ice in a group of people. Also not being accustomed to speaking into a microphone, and being attention deficit, I had a hard time keeping my mouth somewhere near the pick up zone, so the voice was coming through in waves of inside voice, outside voice. Add my animated hand movements and I'm sure I was drawing more attention to me than desired. Did you know there are a ton of rules for public speaking and I broke pretty much all of them. Now how do you not turn your back on someone in a U shaped seating arrangement, and figure out what slide is on the screen? How do you keep your mouth near a stationary microphone and not look around to make eye contact, without looking like Gumby? How do you avoid taking your cats favorite toy (laser pointer) hold it in your hand and not be tempted to flash it at your good friend Janyce, that is sitting right in line with the screen, just for fun...no not in her eyes....!!! Not to mention, I have an anklet of mosquito bites around my left ankle and my pants hem was tickling them just enough to cause a feroucious itching spree, that I was attempting to satisfy with my right foot. Harlot you have my blessings!!!!