Thursday, December 09, 2010

New Buzz words

This is the age that we become the parents to our parents and our children.  Yesterday, I had to make preburial funeral plans with my mom.  This is highly recommended by all senior living places, in order to shelter money they may have.  This money is put into a fund and the price of the funeral home is fixed but the other costs such as cremation, grave opening blah blah may go up.   When I entered the room I sat down and my first picture is just how frail my bossy, independant, perfectionist mother was.  A strong minded woman is just a shell of her old self.  Slipping out of control of what once was her life.  I felt compassion, something I haven't often felt for my mom.  I took her hands and said "Mom, I know we are shoving papers in front of you and asking you to sign them, I know this is hard for you and you have to know that we have your best interest at heart for you.  There are three of us working to make life as good as it can be for you, My sister in law Cheryl is doing way above what any DIL would ever do, my brother and myself are teaming up to take care of mom.  Prepaying for a funeral is kind of cool, you get to pick out exactly what you want, and you or I, got to cry at your decisions while reading verses that say goodbye to your family and friends on a shiney little piece of paper, with your name and date of birth and death printed on them.  It all seemed so final and I tried to make light of a sad situation.  It is now done, her funeral is planned and paid for and now we move on to the next hurdle.  Finding a place for mom to live, new buzz words are "family care" which is a nice way of saying Title 19 or Welfare.  You can only use that when you run out of the funds you saved your whole life and on and on....  So we never stop learning do we?  We learn life at different I am learning Senior stuff and how great is that?  By the time I will need to remember these phrases, they will have changed and I won't remember...I need a  nap!!!

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